#Compartmentalizing - Why Therapists Need Us Patients to Help them with their Problems @Forbes @Tell_Kanjiklub @Guardian @Cosmopolitan @BusinessInsider | #Compartment #Compartmental #Compartmentalization
This is 'one of "those things I do"': I weave back-&-forth between 'focusing on my own problem(s)' and 'thinking about the community/State/Nation's problems'—something I could tie to 'the way the media is today (behaving as if President Trump's- or Taylor Swift's- or Kylie Jenner's- or Kanye West's-personal lives have any big effect on our own personal lives)
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I'm a funny-funny guy. I'm very good at problem-solving. I'm good at helping people look at their situations in more-positive ways. That's awesome.
I'm also a depressed wreck and an unused collection of spare parts; possibly providing lots of comedic material (that I can draw-from after somebody puts the parts to use), but ... it's like 'algebraic equations,' except–instead of 'a variable' (x or y or c or something)–there's just 'an empty space' where 'the solution to the problem' should be ...
... getting back on-topic ... I'm awesome. I'm also a lot of work that I'm too lazy to do without help. Some people I meet while working on the team-effort of 'dealing with my problems,' so I subconsciously convince myself that they don't have any other problems.
But do they? I don't know, because it seems like they compartmentalize me out of their regular lives. My Traumatic Brain-Injury apparently affixes the label "Patient" on me. (True, I'm not 'residing in a hospital'; but–though my 'mind' is relatively undamaged (mostly the frontal-lobe and upper parts of my brain)–the connection between it & my body (my brain-stem) was scrambled, erasing the standard development of maturity.)
I suppose that's how everyone is (I kinda blur "Judge not lest ye be judged" into 'Judge everyone as if they have the same problems & abilities you have')—compartmentalized as one- or another thing,
(I'm thinking about actors ... besides 'society's practice of putting them all into the compartment of 'immature players' (because we feel "they never had to do any 'hard work'"),' audience-members will generally assign 'a typecast' to each actor ... Jim Varney was 'a hick,' John Wayne 'a cowboy,' Megan Fox 'a hot-girl,' Morgan Freeman 'a wise old man,' etc.)
but most 'compartment-names' are "admissive" (giving the compartmentalized person 'a door to show what role they fill to reconnect with the group & -to distinguish themselves away from it from-time-to-time'—mostly Relative-names or Occupation-names) and not "dismissive" (like Prisoner or 'other special-class people' like Patients).
'That word' (below-hyperlinked (several times) to a Forbes-article on the benefits of compart-mentalization) is built on an even-deeper source ... something crucial that firms the foundation upon which our lexicon stands ...
I'm a funny-funny guy. I'm very good at problem-solving. I'm good at helping people look at their situations in more-positive ways. That's awesome.
I'm also a depressed wreck and an unused collection of spare parts; possibly providing lots of comedic material (that I can draw-from after somebody puts the parts to use), but ... it's like 'algebraic equations,' except–instead of 'a variable' (x or y or c or something)–there's just 'an empty space' where 'the solution to the problem' should be ...
... getting back on-topic ... I'm awesome. I'm also a lot of work that I'm too lazy to do without help. Some people I meet while working on the team-effort of 'dealing with my problems,' so I subconsciously convince myself that they don't have any other problems.
But do they? I don't know, because it seems like they compartmentalize me out of their regular lives. My Traumatic Brain-Injury apparently affixes the label "Patient" on me. (True, I'm not 'residing in a hospital'; but–though my 'mind' is relatively undamaged (mostly the frontal-lobe and upper parts of my brain)–the connection between it & my body (my brain-stem) was scrambled, erasing the standard development of maturity.)
I suppose that's how everyone is (I kinda blur "Judge not lest ye be judged" into 'Judge everyone as if they have the same problems & abilities you have')—compartmentalized as one- or another thing,(I'm thinking about actors ... besides 'society's practice of putting them all into the compartment of 'immature players' (because we feel "they never had to do any 'hard work'"),' audience-members will generally assign 'a typecast' to each actor ... Jim Varney was 'a hick,' John Wayne 'a cowboy,' Megan Fox 'a hot-girl,' Morgan Freeman 'a wise old man,' etc.)
but most 'compartment-names' are "admissive" (giving the compartmentalized person 'a door to show what role they fill to reconnect with the group & -to distinguish themselves away from it from-time-to-time'—mostly Relative-names or Occupation-names) and not "dismissive" (like Prisoner or 'other special-class people' like Patients).
'That word' (below-hyperlinked (several times) to a Forbes-article on the benefits of compart-mentalization) is built on an even-deeper source ... something crucial that firms the foundation upon which our lexicon stands ...
The word “Compartmentalization” is built on words that mean “Compartmentalize” + -ation.
The word "Compartmentalize" is built on words that mean "Compartmental" + -ize.
The word "Compartmental" is built on words that mean "Compartment" + |-al.
The word "Compartment" is built on words that mean "a Part, |Piece, Share, |Division" (to Grant, Allot; |Separated from Adjoining Parts).
'Compartmentalizing people' can be useful—when you know what purpose they serve & compartmentalize them into that purpose, you know 'who to go to' when you need that service. But ... I feel 'compartmentalized' out of "real life." I suppose I'll be glad to be 'risen above-&-beyond reality' when I'm no longer "suffering" it; but I want to be 'part of the team that helps others deal with reality' ...
... odd compartmentalization I did there—we often 'deal with reality' by rising 'above-&-beyond reality.' But we don't want to "be there" without "getting there (whether by hiking, climbing, crawling, driving, flying ... or being carried/pushed/lifted/dragged/driven/flown there by bearers/drag-ers/lifters/drivers/Pilots whose training/experience we've been a part-of).
So you don't want help from 'above-&-beyond.' (I know; I say 'you don't want "help from above,"' and you immediately think I'm saying "you don't want 'help from God'"—that's probably the reason Adam took the forbidden fruit that Eve offered him, even though he knew the command was 'not to eat it' ... he wanted 'to be complete' more than he wanted 'to be above-&-beyond'
(Oh, he is 'above-&-beyond'; but not 'alone!' He struggled through life–'equally yoked' with Eve & their children starting with Seth–and they got there ...)
So we come to 'my personal perception of the problem' (your problem with me, my problem with ... me, how you can help, why I fear you probably 'will leave me for dead-- "somebody else to solve the problem-with" or whatever'), the tangent-off-topic I started earlier: ...
I think of something my TBI-survivors' support-group discussed the other night.
One of our members–a non-injured caregiver (of her husband, whom she married before the plane-crash that nearly ended his life) who does crucial work not-only in her husband's life but-also in the group's operations & in important state-legislature involving accessibility–commented that her parents often express regret at their daughter 'not achieving the heights of accomplishment she could've reached if she hadn't been held to the ground by the paralyzed pilot.'
One of our members–a non-injured caregiver (of her husband, whom she married before the plane-crash that nearly ended his life) who does crucial work not-only in her husband's life but-also in the group's operations & in important state-legislature involving accessibility–commented that her parents often express regret at their daughter 'not achieving the heights of accomplishment she could've reached if she hadn't been held to the ground by the paralyzed pilot.'
That goes along with another of our group's leaders, whose wife (whom he married before his hemorrhagic stroke) stuck with him and successfully raised 3 kids and their kids.
Why didn't I get married before my injury? Because I was only 14—barely out of my 'girls have cooties'-phase.
I've seen very few examples of 'men finding wives after brain-injury.' The the way I'd imagined it'd go ever-since I first started my recovery: I imagined a therapist/physician would 'be my partner' ('on-paper marriage' isn't crucial to the relationship, but it does ease the mind a bit to know that we each are 'on a notarized contract' with the other).
Where I started 'looking for my therapist/physician partner' was probably "the wrong place": as I discontinued my 'patient-contract' with the hospital (tho I was an out-patient for a few years, I've been 'out-of-therapy' (I don't even know the terminology—freelance recovery?) for a decade or two), the only place I could meet 'suitable partners' was "when I was invited to the same place they'd be" (which was usually 'a brain-injury camp' or 'speaking to their university-class').
Those are probably 'the wrong places to look for a life-partner' because ... it reveals why Patients (like prisoners, senior-citizens & other 'special classes of people') get 'compartmentalized'—so that people don't have to deal with 'the special class's needs' until it's convenient. Women are raised to expect men to be fully independent, to only depend on their wives to be faithful (true to their husbands, good mothers to their children).
If one of the students I had met were to introduce me to her friends, it probably wouldn't be as a "man" but as a "TBI-survivor" or a "patient" or a "camp-goer" etc. (I admit, that's partially my fault; just like a successful soldier is partially guilty of murder.) Because of my 'survivor'-status, I'm compartmentalized as "their job" or "their school-work," and a shut out of their lives. And it hurts me....
... I'm sorry; I'm so used-to 'having that last part answered with an "I know what we can do about that!"' that I forget that–if I 'end a post' with it–it's more in the position of an "impossible doom" than a "problem with a solution that we might find together."
But it's not an impossible doom, and we can solve it together! How? Well, it may be with a solution I'm not seeing yet.
Those are probably 'the wrong places to look for a life-partner' because ... it reveals why Patients (like prisoners, senior-citizens & other 'special classes of people') get 'compartmentalized'—so that people don't have to deal with 'the special class's needs' until it's convenient. Women are raised to expect men to be fully independent, to only depend on their wives to be faithful (true to their husbands, good mothers to their children).
If one of the students I had met were to introduce me to her friends, it probably wouldn't be as a "man" but as a "TBI-survivor" or a "patient" or a "camp-goer" etc. (I admit, that's partially my fault; just like a successful soldier is partially guilty of murder.) Because of my 'survivor'-status, I'm compartmentalized as "their job" or "their school-work," and a shut out of their lives. And it hurts me....
... I'm sorry; I'm so used-to 'having that last part answered with an "I know what we can do about that!"' that I forget that–if I 'end a post' with it–it's more in the position of an "impossible doom" than a "problem with a solution that we might find together."
But it's not an impossible doom, and we can solve it together! How? Well, it may be with a solution I'm not seeing yet.
But–if you want my suggestion ...
first I need to 'talk to myself' (within your hearing, so you know I know you know what I'm thinking—what we're really doing when we're praying): I need to stop 'apologizing for doing the wrong things in the past,' and to start
'just doing the things I should've done before (of-course adjusted for contemporary situations)
I need one of 'the students (or ministers or teachers or physicians) I've met' to fix me up! (either 'introduce me to one of their friends/colleagues' or be 'The Fix' themselves!) ...
That's what agitates me when people pray ... so often (and I'm probably guilty of this too), they only claim to pray in order that they don't have to deal with the problem themselves! (they only do the 'call for help'-side of the prayer and not the 'listen for instructions'-side; and that way, they can imagine whatever 'instructions/advice' they were going to follow anyway!)
On Facebook–when people claim to be "praying for other people" who are in the hospital or feeling sick or sad or depressed or ignored–so-often I want to reply "NO YOU'RE NOT!' to each-&-every person who 'writes the check but then doesn't sign it' by claiming to pray but then not telling us 'the response/answer to the prayer'—i.e. that they're just wailing to hear themselves whine.
That's what agitates me when people pray ... so often (and I'm probably guilty of this too), they only claim to pray in order that they don't have to deal with the problem themselves! (they only do the 'call for help'-side of the prayer and not the 'listen for instructions'-side; and that way, they can imagine whatever 'instructions/advice' they were going to follow anyway!)
On Facebook–when people claim to be "praying for other people" who are in the hospital or feeling sick or sad or depressed or ignored–so-often I want to reply "NO YOU'RE NOT!' to each-&-every person who 'writes the check but then doesn't sign it' by claiming to pray but then not telling us 'the response/answer to the prayer'—i.e. that they're just wailing to hear themselves whine.
Point is, sometimes 'the answer to our prayers about other people' is a set of instructions (either to pass on to them or -to take action to see fulfilled!) And if you pray without hearing the instructions & 'following them or giving the instructions to someone who will follow them,' you paid them a check that you did not sign!
Usually, that's perfectly fine—as most of the 'others we pray-for' are people who are taking action (usually 'going in for medical examination, operation & recovery,' often 'feeling ill and resting until they get better,' sometimes 'in an unsure period of time regarding current/future employment,' sometimes 'taking a test that will affect their standing in an area of expertise,' etc.)
But in cases like mine (where 'the answer to the prayer' depends on "activity from the people who are praying") ... it reminds me of people who say they'll "move to Canada" if a political-candidate they don't like gets elected to office (moving which never happens! ... well, it rarely happens; but not usually)
Or am I looking at that wrong (or 'wrongly' 🤓)? Tell
me how-wrong/right I am in the comments below 😁
me how-wrong/right I am in the comments below 😁
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